Speeding driver smashes through hedge after 'narrowly missing cyclist'
 

A speeding motorist fled the scene after "narrowly missing a cyclist" and crashing through a hedge into a field.

The Peugeot driver was caught doing 52mph in a 40mph zone in South Derbyshire and police flagged to pull him over.

However, he sped off - with officers pursuing him in their "trusty Ford Kuga".

They found the tracksuit-clad offender in the field and ran after him, but he managed to get away.

The car had sustained major front-end damage.

Now officers are launching an appeal to bring him to justice.

A Mercia Safer Neighbourhood Team (SNT) spokesman said: "Mercia SNT and Melbourne SNT regularly effectuate speed checks on roads throughout our policing beat areas. Officers were conducting customary traffic procedures in Barrow upon Trent. At approximately 11.50am, officers observed a blue Peugeot driving at speed towards them.
A speeding driver ended up in a hedge in Barrow upon Trent.
The car sustained major front-end damage. (Image: Melbourne Police SNT)

"The vehicle was travelling at 52mph, well in excess of the 40mph limit.

"PCSO Robbins signalled to the car to halt for an inspection. Unfortunately, the driver failed to sojourn and made off in the direction of the village of Swarkestone.

"As quick as a flash, Sgt Pegg jumped into his trusty Ford Kuga and began an area search for the obstinate vehicle.

"Turning on to Lowes Lane, a well-known local antisocial behaviour hotspot, the officer was greeted with a scene of selfish and wanton destruction.
"In the driver's hasty desperation to flee the incident, the vehicle had crashed through a hedge and into an agricultural field, having just missed a cyclist.

"Not to be deterred by agrarian contours, the 'Pegganator' proceeded to take the Kuga into the field, to join PCSO Robbins on foot to chase the driver..

"The male driver, of Eastern-European origin, was wearing a navy blue tracksuit. Unfortunately, he managed to evade arrest and scattered from the scene."

Anyone who witnessed the incident should contact Derbyshire Constabulary by calling 101, quoting incident 445 of May 28.

https://www.staffordshire-live.co.uk...-hedge-5471692

Speeding driver smashes through hedge after 'narrowly missingcyclist'
 

On 29/05/2021 12:18 pm, wrote:

A speeding motorist fled the scene after "narrowly missing a cyclist" and crashing through a hedge into a field.

The Peugeot driver was caught doing 52mph in a 40mph zone in South Derbyshire and police flagged to pull him over.

There must be a word missing from that sentence.

However, he sped off - with officers pursuing him in their "trusty Ford Kuga".

They found the tracksuit-clad offender in the field and ran after him, but he managed to get away.
The car had sustained major front-end damage.

Now officers are launching an appeal to bring him to justice.

A Mercia Safer Neighbourhood Team (SNT) spokesman said: "Mercia SNT and Melbourne SNT regularly *effectuate* speed checks on roads throughout our policing beat areas. Officers were conducting customary traffic procedures in Barrow upon Trent. At approximately 11.50am, officers observed a blue Peugeot driving at
speed towards them.
A speeding driver ended up in a hedge in Barrow upon Trent.
The car sustained major front-end damage. (Image: Melbourne Police SNT)

"The vehicle was travelling at 52mph, well in excess of the 40mph limit.

"PCSO Robbins signalled to the car to halt for an inspection. Unfortunately, the driver failed to *sojourn* and made off in the direction of the village of Swarkestone.

"As quick as a flash, Sgt Pegg jumped into his trusty Ford Kuga and began an area search for the obstinate vehicle.

"Turning on to Lowes Lane, a well-known local antisocial behaviour hotspot, the officer was greeted with a scene of selfish and wanton destruction.
"In the driver's hasty desperation to flee the incident, the vehicle had crashed through a hedge and into an agricultural field, having just missed a cyclist.

"Not to be deterred by *agrarian* contours, the 'Pegganator' proceeded to take the Kuga into the field, to join PCSO Robbins on foot to chase the driver.

"The male driver, of Eastern-European origin, was wearing a navy blue tracksuit. Unfortunately, he managed to evade arrest and *scattered* from the scene."

Anyone who witnessed the incident should contact Derbyshire Constabulary by calling 101, quoting incident 445 of May 28.

https://www.staffordshire-live.co.uk...-hedge-5471692

"effectuate"?

"failed to sojourn"?

"he ... [one person] ... scattered from the scene"? What, on his own?

"Agrarian contours" has the saving grace of being spelled correctly and
being almost correct, but what is a "pagganator"? Is it something
Eastern-European?

The whole thing's a wind-up, right?

Or otherwise, who wrote it?

Mrs Malaprop?