"His Highness the TibetanMonkey & the Spirits of the Jungle"
wrote in message
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[...]
I have my own pretty story to tell, a note from Buddha that I delayed
announcing until a letter such as above became public, and I'd sound
believable. The note read like this:

His Highness the Wise TibetanMonkey, King of the Apes & the Spirits of
the Jungle:

It is my pleasure to write to you after having found the proper
reincarnation. You don't know what I've been through in the
reincarnation business. I've been a small fish among the big fish and
it ain't easy. The Christians don't know **** because they go with the
flow, so to speak.

Well, I sat under the tree in that lotus position and it was mighty
difficult to hold for long, and then you came along with your hammock.
That was what I was looking for, but it wasn't invented when I was
around.

Anyway, I give you the authority to act on my behalf, and proclaim to
the world that religion is bull****. Only wisdom --the Wisdom of the
Jungle-- will be used to analyze human behavior. Go for it, MonkeyBoy!
I liked your motto: "Nirvana with a banana!"

PS: Say hello to your parrots, Buddhy specially, as well to the
gerbils and the little mouse, Coco --she's so cute! Tell her she will
be a cat in reincarnation.

And at that point the ink disappeared before my eyes as if by magic --
which it surely was.

You are an infecting, sick-minded, phlegmy hippopotamus.

****ing Regards,

Ed Dolan the Great - Minnesota
aka
Saint Edward the Great - Order of the Perpetual Sorrows - Minnesota