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10 Laws of Cycling



 
 
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  #1  
Old November 25th 04, 05:02 PM
MagillaGorilla
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Default 10 Laws of Cycling

Ten Laws of Cycling:

1. Tyler is innocent.

2. The Australian federation thinks that the WADA rule regarding the
mandatory testing of B samples doesn't apply to their test, even though
the rule doesn't state that.

3. Jeff Jones is embarassed at his country's lawsuit and blood doping
test because he knows deep down inside it's wrong (just like he knows
Sara Carrigan is a wheel-sucker).

4. Most pople in RBR are gay.

5. Magilla is most likely Jesus Christ himself.

6. Religious people are gay.

7. Euros dope because they have weak minds. Iban Mayo showed what
European character is really all about. And Richard Virenque cried when
he was wrongly accused in 1998 of taking drugs only to reveal he's a
doped up fraud whose only talent is winning a meaningless competition
that has nothing to do with who the best climber in the Tour de France is.

8. Lance is the best climber in the Tour de France, not Jalabert or
Virenque.

9. Lance has shown that most races aren't worth doing because it doesn't
mean anything to win them.

10. The Giro and Vuelta are second rate races that prove little or
nothing about the rider who wins them other than they'll probably lose
22 minutes on the first major Col to Lance in July, and then wonder why
the Tour isn't like the Giro.


Save the turkeys,

Magilla
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  #2  
Old November 28th 04, 06:00 AM
Sierraman
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Posts: n/a
Default


"MagillaGorilla" wrote in message
...
Ten Laws of Cycling:


Bored, so I'll cut up a bit. Quick and dirty.

1. Tyler is innocent.


I don't know. I hope he is for Tugboats sake.

2. The Australian federation thinks that the WADA rule regarding the
mandatory testing of B samples doesn't apply to their test, even though
the rule doesn't state that.

3. Jeff Jones is embarassed at his country's lawsuit and blood doping
test because he knows deep down inside it's wrong (just like he knows
Sara Carrigan is a wheel-sucker).


Jeff is just trying to survive on coffee and bread, but maybe he has
upgraded to danish. Sara, yeah, seemed like a fluke win, I blame Judith and
her finger. Lung-Skag is wheel sucker too and she's butt ugly. Sara is
cuter.

4. Most pople in RBR are gay.


Pople, what is a Pople? Way too many things are called gay today.

5. Magilla is most likely Jesus Christ himself.


Watch the Passion, if you haven't seen it.

6. Religious people are gay.


Right, everything is gay.


7. Euros dope because they have weak minds. Iban Mayo showed what
European character is really all about. And Richard Virenque cried when
he was wrongly accused in 1998 of taking drugs only to reveal he's a
doped up fraud whose only talent is winning a meaningless competition
that has nothing to do with who the best climber in the Tour de France is.


Could be.

8. Lance is the best climber in the Tour de France, not Jalabert or
Virenque.


yes, no one can beat Lance when he wants to make a point. I am still waiting
for Lance to pull a Merckx to prove his greatness by bolting at the
beginning of the stage and beating everyone by staying out front and then
winning the stage by a margin like Indurain did. Not that he has to prove
anything in the TDF, but that would be nice, shades of Merckx. Lance always
wins his stages at the end by saving his juice.


9. Lance has shown that most races aren't worth doing because it doesn't
mean anything to win them.


Paris-R, Giro, Tour of Spain, worlds, few others are all that count, true.
Paris-R would be very honorable for Lance.

10. The Giro and Vuelta are second rate races that prove little or
nothing about the rider who wins them other than they'll probably lose
22 minutes on the first major Col to Lance in July, and then wonder why
the Tour isn't like the Giro.


Takes a grand tour rider who can ride all three, and also win one like
Indurain.


Save the turkeys,


Sandwiches, stay away from Quiznos for at least a week.


  #3  
Old November 28th 04, 06:00 AM
Sierraman
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"MagillaGorilla" wrote in message
...
Ten Laws of Cycling:


Bored, so I'll cut up a bit. Quick and dirty.

1. Tyler is innocent.


I don't know. I hope he is for Tugboats sake.

2. The Australian federation thinks that the WADA rule regarding the
mandatory testing of B samples doesn't apply to their test, even though
the rule doesn't state that.

3. Jeff Jones is embarassed at his country's lawsuit and blood doping
test because he knows deep down inside it's wrong (just like he knows
Sara Carrigan is a wheel-sucker).


Jeff is just trying to survive on coffee and bread, but maybe he has
upgraded to danish. Sara, yeah, seemed like a fluke win, I blame Judith and
her finger. Lung-Skag is wheel sucker too and she's butt ugly. Sara is
cuter.

4. Most pople in RBR are gay.


Pople, what is a Pople? Way too many things are called gay today.

5. Magilla is most likely Jesus Christ himself.


Watch the Passion, if you haven't seen it.

6. Religious people are gay.


Right, everything is gay.


7. Euros dope because they have weak minds. Iban Mayo showed what
European character is really all about. And Richard Virenque cried when
he was wrongly accused in 1998 of taking drugs only to reveal he's a
doped up fraud whose only talent is winning a meaningless competition
that has nothing to do with who the best climber in the Tour de France is.


Could be.

8. Lance is the best climber in the Tour de France, not Jalabert or
Virenque.


yes, no one can beat Lance when he wants to make a point. I am still waiting
for Lance to pull a Merckx to prove his greatness by bolting at the
beginning of the stage and beating everyone by staying out front and then
winning the stage by a margin like Indurain did. Not that he has to prove
anything in the TDF, but that would be nice, shades of Merckx. Lance always
wins his stages at the end by saving his juice.


9. Lance has shown that most races aren't worth doing because it doesn't
mean anything to win them.


Paris-R, Giro, Tour of Spain, worlds, few others are all that count, true.
Paris-R would be very honorable for Lance.

10. The Giro and Vuelta are second rate races that prove little or
nothing about the rider who wins them other than they'll probably lose
22 minutes on the first major Col to Lance in July, and then wonder why
the Tour isn't like the Giro.


Takes a grand tour rider who can ride all three, and also win one like
Indurain.


Save the turkeys,


Sandwiches, stay away from Quiznos for at least a week.


  #4  
Old November 29th 04, 04:45 AM
Carmella the Roach Killer
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Ex-****ing-actly! No doubt. Nuf said.

"Sierraman" wrote in message
...

"MagillaGorilla" wrote in message
...
Ten Laws of Cycling:


Bored, so I'll cut up a bit. Quick and dirty.

1. Tyler is innocent.


I don't know. I hope he is for Tugboats sake.

2. The Australian federation thinks that the WADA rule regarding the
mandatory testing of B samples doesn't apply to their test, even though
the rule doesn't state that.

3. Jeff Jones is embarassed at his country's lawsuit and blood doping
test because he knows deep down inside it's wrong (just like he knows
Sara Carrigan is a wheel-sucker).


Jeff is just trying to survive on coffee and bread, but maybe he has
upgraded to danish. Sara, yeah, seemed like a fluke win, I blame Judith
and
her finger. Lung-Skag is wheel sucker too and she's butt ugly. Sara is
cuter.

4. Most pople in RBR are gay.


Pople, what is a Pople? Way too many things are called gay today.

5. Magilla is most likely Jesus Christ himself.


Watch the Passion, if you haven't seen it.

6. Religious people are gay.


Right, everything is gay.


7. Euros dope because they have weak minds. Iban Mayo showed what
European character is really all about. And Richard Virenque cried when
he was wrongly accused in 1998 of taking drugs only to reveal he's a
doped up fraud whose only talent is winning a meaningless competition
that has nothing to do with who the best climber in the Tour de France
is.


Could be.

8. Lance is the best climber in the Tour de France, not Jalabert or
Virenque.


yes, no one can beat Lance when he wants to make a point. I am still
waiting
for Lance to pull a Merckx to prove his greatness by bolting at the
beginning of the stage and beating everyone by staying out front and then
winning the stage by a margin like Indurain did. Not that he has to prove
anything in the TDF, but that would be nice, shades of Merckx. Lance
always
wins his stages at the end by saving his juice.


9. Lance has shown that most races aren't worth doing because it doesn't
mean anything to win them.


Paris-R, Giro, Tour of Spain, worlds, few others are all that count, true.
Paris-R would be very honorable for Lance.

10. The Giro and Vuelta are second rate races that prove little or
nothing about the rider who wins them other than they'll probably lose
22 minutes on the first major Col to Lance in July, and then wonder why
the Tour isn't like the Giro.


Takes a grand tour rider who can ride all three, and also win one like
Indurain.


Save the turkeys,


Sandwiches, stay away from Quiznos for at least a week.




  #5  
Old November 29th 04, 04:45 AM
Carmella the Roach Killer
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Ex-****ing-actly! No doubt. Nuf said.

"Sierraman" wrote in message
...

"MagillaGorilla" wrote in message
...
Ten Laws of Cycling:


Bored, so I'll cut up a bit. Quick and dirty.

1. Tyler is innocent.


I don't know. I hope he is for Tugboats sake.

2. The Australian federation thinks that the WADA rule regarding the
mandatory testing of B samples doesn't apply to their test, even though
the rule doesn't state that.

3. Jeff Jones is embarassed at his country's lawsuit and blood doping
test because he knows deep down inside it's wrong (just like he knows
Sara Carrigan is a wheel-sucker).


Jeff is just trying to survive on coffee and bread, but maybe he has
upgraded to danish. Sara, yeah, seemed like a fluke win, I blame Judith
and
her finger. Lung-Skag is wheel sucker too and she's butt ugly. Sara is
cuter.

4. Most pople in RBR are gay.


Pople, what is a Pople? Way too many things are called gay today.

5. Magilla is most likely Jesus Christ himself.


Watch the Passion, if you haven't seen it.

6. Religious people are gay.


Right, everything is gay.


7. Euros dope because they have weak minds. Iban Mayo showed what
European character is really all about. And Richard Virenque cried when
he was wrongly accused in 1998 of taking drugs only to reveal he's a
doped up fraud whose only talent is winning a meaningless competition
that has nothing to do with who the best climber in the Tour de France
is.


Could be.

8. Lance is the best climber in the Tour de France, not Jalabert or
Virenque.


yes, no one can beat Lance when he wants to make a point. I am still
waiting
for Lance to pull a Merckx to prove his greatness by bolting at the
beginning of the stage and beating everyone by staying out front and then
winning the stage by a margin like Indurain did. Not that he has to prove
anything in the TDF, but that would be nice, shades of Merckx. Lance
always
wins his stages at the end by saving his juice.


9. Lance has shown that most races aren't worth doing because it doesn't
mean anything to win them.


Paris-R, Giro, Tour of Spain, worlds, few others are all that count, true.
Paris-R would be very honorable for Lance.

10. The Giro and Vuelta are second rate races that prove little or
nothing about the rider who wins them other than they'll probably lose
22 minutes on the first major Col to Lance in July, and then wonder why
the Tour isn't like the Giro.


Takes a grand tour rider who can ride all three, and also win one like
Indurain.


Save the turkeys,


Sandwiches, stay away from Quiznos for at least a week.




  #6  
Old November 29th 04, 09:57 PM
Papai Digital
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

MagillaGorilla wrote in message ...
Ten Laws of Cycling:

1. Tyler is innocent.


Word.

2. The Australian federation thinks that the WADA rule regarding the
mandatory testing of B samples doesn't apply to their test, even though
the rule doesn't state that.


oo complicated, but I agree with you.

3. Jeff Jones is embarassed at his country's lawsuit and blood doping
test because he knows deep down inside it's wrong (just like he knows
Sara Carrigan is a wheel-sucker).


Does it matter?

4. Most pople in RBR are gay.


Happy? Yes.

5. Magilla is most likely Jesus Christ himself.
6. Religious people are gay.
7. Euros dope because they have weak minds.


TRUE. Same for cheating USA-only pros.

8. Lance is the best climber in the Tour de France, not Jalabert or
Virenque.


EASILY TRUE. Been proven for 6 years running now too.

9. Lance has shown that most races aren't worth doing because it doesn't
mean anything to win them.
10. The Giro and Vuelta are second rate races that prove little or
nothing about the rider who wins them other than they'll probably lose
22 minutes on the first major Col to Lance in July, and then wonder why
the Tour isn't like the Giro.


Been true for 6 years now. Very cogent you can be.

-Ken
  #7  
Old November 29th 04, 09:57 PM
Papai Digital
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

MagillaGorilla wrote in message ...
Ten Laws of Cycling:

1. Tyler is innocent.


Word.

2. The Australian federation thinks that the WADA rule regarding the
mandatory testing of B samples doesn't apply to their test, even though
the rule doesn't state that.


oo complicated, but I agree with you.

3. Jeff Jones is embarassed at his country's lawsuit and blood doping
test because he knows deep down inside it's wrong (just like he knows
Sara Carrigan is a wheel-sucker).


Does it matter?

4. Most pople in RBR are gay.


Happy? Yes.

5. Magilla is most likely Jesus Christ himself.
6. Religious people are gay.
7. Euros dope because they have weak minds.


TRUE. Same for cheating USA-only pros.

8. Lance is the best climber in the Tour de France, not Jalabert or
Virenque.


EASILY TRUE. Been proven for 6 years running now too.

9. Lance has shown that most races aren't worth doing because it doesn't
mean anything to win them.
10. The Giro and Vuelta are second rate races that prove little or
nothing about the rider who wins them other than they'll probably lose
22 minutes on the first major Col to Lance in July, and then wonder why
the Tour isn't like the Giro.


Been true for 6 years now. Very cogent you can be.

-Ken
  #8  
Old November 29th 04, 11:42 PM
Warren
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"Papai Digital" wrote in message
om...
MagillaGorilla wrote in message

...
Ten Laws of Cycling:
7. Euros dope because they have weak minds.


TRUE. Same for cheating USA-only pros.


No. Most Euros, and some USA pros see cycling as a job, not a sport or a
game to be played "fairly", and the jobs they could do as an alternative
have their own risks. Why does a truck driver break the law by driving over
the speed limit? Do truck drivers ever take drugs (like caffeine) to help
them get better results in their job?Which would cause more personal harm,
using EPO as a pro bike racer or getting in an accident while driving the
truck for a living? Do some white-collar workers lie and cheat to get better
results or use caffeine as a stimulant?

-WG


  #9  
Old November 29th 04, 11:42 PM
Warren
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"Papai Digital" wrote in message
om...
MagillaGorilla wrote in message

...
Ten Laws of Cycling:
7. Euros dope because they have weak minds.


TRUE. Same for cheating USA-only pros.


No. Most Euros, and some USA pros see cycling as a job, not a sport or a
game to be played "fairly", and the jobs they could do as an alternative
have their own risks. Why does a truck driver break the law by driving over
the speed limit? Do truck drivers ever take drugs (like caffeine) to help
them get better results in their job?Which would cause more personal harm,
using EPO as a pro bike racer or getting in an accident while driving the
truck for a living? Do some white-collar workers lie and cheat to get better
results or use caffeine as a stimulant?

-WG


 




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