How should I have reacted?

Yesterday evening I lost my temper for the first time in about 15 years.
You've guessed it - it was with someone driving a car. The car in question
almost flattened me as it entered a roundabout I was on, stopping 3 inches
from my left side. I responded with a rather uninspired "You stupid
f*cker!", before regaining my self control. On the remaining 10 miles of my
journey I mulled over how I could have reacted in a way that would maximise
the chance that he would drive better in future. Should I have:

- Reshaped his Alfa Romeo with my D-lock?
- Acted as if I was hit by him and collapsed to the ground screaming in
pain?
- Pretended to call the police?

Any ideas would be welcome, because I'm sure something similar will happen
in the future and I would like to have a response pre-planned.

Bob

PS If you're interested, it was dark at the time, I had Cateye 10W halogen
and LED head-lamps, was wearing a yellow jacket with reflective piping and
carrying two flourescent yellow panniers. I was travelling at about 10 miles
per hour and the area was well lit with street lamps. The driver told me
that he didn't see me because I was 'in his pillar'. I sure that he would
have ploughed straight through me had I not been shouting "Ooiii!" at the
top of my voice.

On Tue, 23 Nov 2004 22:29:50 -0000, "MielBob"
robertReplaceThisWithAnAtSignjohnstone26.freeserv e.co.uk wrote:

Should I have:

- Reshaped his Alfa Romeo with my D-lock?

No. Alfas are works of art.

- Acted as if I was hit by him and collapsed to the ground screaming in
pain?

No. You would get dirty and wet, and probably run over by someone
else.

- Pretended to call the police?

Hahahahahahahahahaha. In the time it takes them to answer the bloody
telephone, you could have been home.

The driver told me
that he didn't see me because I was 'in his pillar'. I sure that he would
have ploughed straight through me had I not been shouting "Ooiii!" at the
top of my voice.


As A-pillars get thicker, this is an increasing problem. The driver
now knows this and will be aware.

On Tue, 23 Nov 2004 22:29:50 -0000, "MielBob"
robertReplaceThisWithAnAtSignjohnstone26.freeserv e.co.uk wrote:

Yesterday evening I lost my temper for the first time in about 15 years.
You've guessed it - it was with someone driving a car. The car in question
almost flattened me as it entered a roundabout I was on, stopping 3 inches
from my left side. I responded with a rather uninspired "You stupid
f*cker!", before regaining my self control. On the remaining 10 miles of my
journey I mulled over how I could have reacted in a way that would maximise
the chance that he would drive better in future. Should I have:

- Reshaped his Alfa Romeo with my D-lock?

I suppose it might help reinforce the lesson. OTOH, a bit, er,
criminal for my tastes.

- Acted as if I was hit by him and collapsed to the ground screaming in
pain?

I've always fancied this gambit. But a bit too much like tempting
fate.

- Pretended to call the police?

Makes a change from the police pretending to give a ****, I suppose.

Any ideas would be welcome, because I'm sure something similar will happen
in the future and I would like to have a response pre-planned.

Bob

PS If you're interested, it was dark at the time, I had Cateye 10W halogen
and LED head-lamps, was wearing a yellow jacket with reflective piping and
carrying two flourescent yellow panniers. I was travelling at about 10 miles
per hour and the area was well lit with street lamps. The driver told me
that he didn't see me because I was 'in his pillar'. I sure that he would
have ploughed straight through me had I not been shouting "Ooiii!" at the
top of my voice.

Hi there.

Best advice is to chill...

This sort of sh*t happens all the time, if you let yourself get wound
up every time you will do your self no good at all.

It would be better to try and anticpate this sort of stuff, and be
ready with a plan for evasive action. Then when the worst does happen
you are neither suprised on unprepared - "hang on there's another
d*****d motorist".

I get this every morning at a busy roundabout, so I usually take to the
extreme right hand edge of my lane, so that when they do pull on in
front of me I've got some space to play with.

Advance verbal warnings ("oi") can help. The most satisfying commuting
incident I've ever had was when I saw a car about to do as your chap
was, and I gave a loud "oi". I think up to this point he had genuinely
not seen me, as he slammed on the anchors, ending up with the car's
nose sticking 3 foot into my lane...

....at which point I heard the satisfying crunch as he got rear-ended by
the other d*****d motorist behind him!
Cheers, Andy

www.stirling-tri.co.uk

[Not Responding] wrote:
On Tue, 23 Nov 2004 22:29:50 -0000, "MielBob"
robertReplaceThisWithAnAtSignjohnstone26.freeserv e.co.uk wrote:

Yesterday evening I lost my temper.... The car in question
almost flattened me as it entered a roundabout I was on... I mulled
over how
I could have reacted in a way that would maximise
the chance that he would drive better in future. Should I have:
snip
- Pretended to call the police?

Makes a change from the police pretending to give a ****, I suppose.


where is this place where the polis would pretend to give a **** about
the incident described by the OP? I may move there :-)
best wishes
james

Response to :
The car in question
almost flattened me as it entered a roundabout I was on, stopping 3 inches
from my left side. I responded with a rather uninspired "You stupid
f*cker!", before regaining my self control. On the remaining 10 miles of my
journey I mulled over how I could have reacted in a way that would maximise
the chance that he would drive better in future.


Judging from the times it's happened to me, I seem to react instinctively
in either of two ways: if I've been genuinely scared and am chock-full of
adrenalin, I yell "You stupid f*cker!" or variants thereof; if it's only
a non-lethal cutting-up-style tw@-manouevre, I do the naughty-boy finger-
wagging, ironic-applause approach, which I fondly hope will shame the
moron into better behavior. Probably doesn't work, though. :-( (And if
I've dented his precious machismo, it could make matters worse.)

--
Mark, UK.
We hope to hear him swear, we love to hear him squeak,
We like to see him biting fingers in his horny beak.

"MielBob" robertReplaceThisWithAnAtSignjohnstone26.freeserv e.co.uk wrote in message ...
Yesterday evening I lost my temper for the first time in about 15 years.
You've guessed it - it was with someone driving a car. The car in question
almost flattened me as it entered a roundabout I was on, stopping 3 inches
from my left side. I responded with a rather uninspired "You stupid
f*cker!", before regaining my self control. On the remaining 10 miles of my
journey I mulled over how I could have reacted in a way that would maximise
the chance that he would drive better in future. Should I have:

- Reshaped his Alfa Romeo with my D-lock?
- Acted as if I was hit by him and collapsed to the ground screaming in
pain?
- Pretended to call the police?

Any ideas would be welcome, because I'm sure something similar will happen
in the future and I would like to have a response pre-planned.

Being nearly hit from the left when you have right of way is one of
the most unnerving experiences for a cyclist. It sounds as though both
of you came to a complete stop. In that situation the most effective
thing you can do IMHO is to take your time getting going again. Look
shocked and dismayed, mop your brow, give him a long sad disbelieving
look, shake your head, then move slowly off. Becoming aggressive will
only trigger a defensive reaction. Hold him and the traffic behind him
up for couple of minutes while you regain your compsure. This is
"shame therapy", a form of aversion therapy and may actually help
modify the driver's behaviour.

While you're doing all this of course, remember you are stopped on a
roundabout and be aware of the traffic around you. And as you set off
again watch out for other cagers pulling out of the queue and zooming
past on the left. Knowing that you followed a plan and that your
reaction was the one most likely to influence the driver's behaviour
should help you to feel better afterwards.

--
Dave...

On Wed, 24 Nov 2004 06:09:08 +0000, " [Not Responding] "
wrote:

- Pretended to call the police?

Makes a change from the police pretending to give a ****, I suppose.

You owe me a new keyboard.

MielBob wrote:
Yesterday evening I lost my temper for the first time in about 15 years.
You've guessed it - it was with someone driving a car. The car in question
almost flattened me as it entered a roundabout I was on, stopping 3 inches
from my left side. I responded with a rather uninspired "You stupid
f*cker!", before regaining my self control. On the remaining 10 miles of my
journey I mulled over how I could have reacted in a way that would maximise
the chance that he would drive better in future. Should I have:

- Reshaped his Alfa Romeo with my D-lock?
- Acted as if I was hit by him and collapsed to the ground screaming in
pain?
- Pretended to call the police?

Any ideas would be welcome, because I'm sure something similar will happen
in the future and I would like to have a response pre-planned.

Bob

PS If you're interested, it was dark at the time, I had Cateye 10W halogen
and LED head-lamps, was wearing a yellow jacket with reflective piping and
carrying two flourescent yellow panniers. I was travelling at about 10 miles
per hour and the area was well lit with street lamps. The driver told me
that he didn't see me because I was 'in his pillar'. I sure that he would
have ploughed straight through me had I not been shouting "Ooiii!" at the
top of my voice.



Having attended a number of road incidents which were near, but not,
collisions and their resultant aftermath when one party or the other had
given vent to their, rightly or wrongly, held feelings I would have to
advise do nothing but think what ever you like.
I say this because in such instances it is often not the event which
triggers a violent episode but reaction to that event. Hence, dare I
mention it? the skate boarder knifed to death that was posted a few
weeks ago, the father and child deliberately backed over at speed and
run down by some 4x4 bully who had just passed to closely... these are
examples we have read about here on this forum.
You are on a bicycle and hence very vulnerable should the other party
either decide to knock you down with their vehicle, knife you, give you
a good bashing or otherwise abuse you. I can guarantee, almost, that no
one will come to your aid.
It is just not worth putting yourself in further danger even though you
may be justified in your reaction and feelings.

Sniper8052

Thanks everyone for the advice and the anecdote, Andy.

Dave Kahn wrote:
Being nearly hit from the left when you have right of way is one of
the most unnerving experiences for a cyclist. It sounds as though both
of you came to a complete stop.

You're right, it was unnerving, and yes, we both came to a stop. I'm no
cycling novice, but this was the scariest thing that's ever happened to me.

I'll bear in mind your "shame therapy" idea in future. The D-lock vandalism
idea was of course meant to be humourous, but also to indicate the
difficulty in behaving rationally once you've lost your temper. I agree that
following a plan in such encounters is important and I'm sure I'll handle
things better next time - unless the car hits me, of course.

Cheers,
Bob