How to make an ugly bike

Rick Onanian wrote:

And don't forget the rust.

My bike is uglified for theft prevention, but the thought occurs to me that
if the beater looks too beat, then a thief in need of quick and cheap
transportation may justify his actions by thinking that nobody would want a
bike that's as ugly as the rusting hulk he sees at the corner store.

RFM
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Pete wrote:

"Gary Smiley" wrote in message
...
You're all missing the point:
Why not use a good lock- one that can't be defeated - like Kryptonite's
New York lock?
Then you don't have to screw up the appearance of your bike.
And it's much easier to do.

No such thing as a lock that cannot be defeated. If you can't break the
lock, break what it is locked to.

An attractive bike, in the right (wrong) place, day after day...will get
stolen eventually.

Pete


Eventually. But eventually can be far enough in the future that it's
irrelevant, e.g. leaving the bike long enough to grab a meal.

I'm reminded of some Boston press I read in the 70's about the original
Kryptonite U-lock, the one made of stainless flat bar, not the tubular
shaped one you see today. Seems someone (the lock mfgr? The
newspaper?) secured several bikes - each with a different popular lock -
to sturdy, anchored-down things and left them. Each day the bikes were
checked. *All* of the chains and puny locks gave up their bikes intact,
but the Kryptonite-secured bike lasted for weeks. Eventually only the
rear wheel and frame - the locked parts - remained.

My old flat bar Kryptonite still gives great service.

Thomas Reynolds wrote:

I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. While I am in the store
I am always paranoid that someone will steal my bike.

So I got this old GT hardtail mountain bike for free and have spent
$50 fixing it up. It is almost finished and I want to make it
functional, but as ugly as possible so no one will want to steal it.

I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Tom


Long plastic streamers. Definitely lots of plastic streamers in gay
colors. (Hmmm ... I wonder if they're still available ...) CB antenna
mounted on the tail end (pun intended) and a racoon tail tied to the top
of the antenna.

"Michael" wrote in message ...

I'm reminded of some Boston press I read in the 70's about the original
Kryptonite U-lock, the one made of stainless flat bar, not the tubular
shaped one you see today. Seems someone (the lock mfgr? The
newspaper?) secured several bikes - each with a different popular lock -
to sturdy, anchored-down things and left them. Each day the bikes were
checked. *All* of the chains and puny locks gave up their bikes intact,
but the Kryptonite-secured bike lasted for weeks. Eventually only the
rear wheel and frame - the locked parts - remained.

My old flat bar Kryptonite still gives great service.

Mine too. I bought it in 1970 or so, immediately after they came out.
Unfortunately, they were out of stock for a couple of weeks, and my bike was
stolen. I got the lock *before* my replacement bike, and I still have both
today. Weighs a ton though.

"di" wrote in message
.. .
Just go to Walmart and buy a new one. or use theirs for examples,
especially
the paint jobs hoping to make the bike look expensive, :)


More to the point, given the prices of bikes at Walmart now, it seems to me
that nobody in their right mind is going to steal an old bike...at least not
as a way of trying to make money. A thief probably wouldn't be able to give
it away. As long as the bike is minimally locked so somebody doesn't grab
for the hell of it, I think that the uglification is probably a waste of
time.

Mark

(Thomas Reynolds) wrote in message om...
I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. While I am in the store
I am always paranoid that someone will steal my bike.

So I got this old GT hardtail mountain bike for free and have spent
$50 fixing it up. It is almost finished and I want to make it
functional, but as ugly as possible so no one will want to steal it.

I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Tom

Duct tape a length of broomstick to your top tube (make the length of
broomstick slightly longer than the top tube) Allow the broomstick to
show through in several areas of the tape. It will appear as though
the bike is broken and only being held together by a stick and tape.

"Mark Weaver" wrote in message
...


More to the point, given the prices of bikes at Walmart now, it seems to
me
that nobody in their right mind is going to steal an old bike...at least
not
as a way of trying to make money. A thief probably wouldn't be able to
give
it away. As long as the bike is minimally locked so somebody doesn't grab
for the hell of it, I think that the uglification is probably a waste of
time.

Regardless, bikes get stolen. And looks do matter.
Last fall, a thief broke into the porch where my daughter lives and stole
only 1 bike:
a pink Specialized Crossroads, several years old and ridden hard.
an unearthly green Schwinn Caliente, decades old
another vintage college kid bike; don't have the details.
Only the Crossroads was stolen -- ironically, we'd joked about the pink
color scaring away thieves.
But, of the three bikes, it was the best looking one.

Peter Cole wrote:

"Michael" wrote in message ...

I'm reminded of some Boston press I read in the 70's about the original
Kryptonite U-lock, the one made of stainless flat bar, not the tubular
shaped one you see today. Seems someone (the lock mfgr? The
newspaper?) secured several bikes - each with a different popular lock -
to sturdy, anchored-down things and left them. Each day the bikes were
checked. *All* of the chains and puny locks gave up their bikes intact,
but the Kryptonite-secured bike lasted for weeks. Eventually only the
rear wheel and frame - the locked parts - remained.

My old flat bar Kryptonite still gives great service.

Mine too. I bought it in 1970 or so, immediately after they came out.
Unfortunately, they were out of stock for a couple of weeks, and my bike was
stolen. I got the lock *before* my replacement bike, and I still have both
today. Weighs a ton though.

You're the only other person I've encountered in many years who has one
..... or even knows about them.

As you probably know, Kryptonite intended to produce a secure
alternative to the chain-and-padlock that was the norm back then. So
today I look around and see .... lots of cables! Hey guys ... ever hear
of bolt cutters?

Since I don't race or ride more than 20 miles/day, I don't care that my
lock is heavy. What does bug be though is the chattering noise it makes
now. My Kryptonite hanger was always clamped to the "horizontal tube"
(I don't know what it's called) and just forward of the tip of the
saddle; several days ago the sheet metal tore a good pair of shorts, so
I moved it to the seat tube. Now the lock's flat closure bar rattles
and buzzes ... and I keep checking to see if the rear del needs a nudge
to one side or the other. I need to get a small binji and fix that
lock!

Peter Cole wrote:

"Michael" wrote in message ...

I'm reminded of some Boston press I read in the 70's about the original
Kryptonite U-lock, the one made of stainless flat bar, not the tubular
shaped one you see today. Seems someone (the lock mfgr? The
newspaper?) secured several bikes - each with a different popular lock -
to sturdy, anchored-down things and left them. Each day the bikes were
checked. *All* of the chains and puny locks gave up their bikes intact,
but the Kryptonite-secured bike lasted for weeks. Eventually only the
rear wheel and frame - the locked parts - remained.

My old flat bar Kryptonite still gives great service.

Mine too. I bought it in 1970 or so, immediately after they came out.
Unfortunately, they were out of stock for a couple of weeks, and my bike was
stolen. I got the lock *before* my replacement bike, and I still have both
today. Weighs a ton though.

You're the only other person I've encountered in many years who has one
..... or even knows about them.

As you probably know, Kryptonite intended to produce a secure
alternative to the chain-and-padlock that was the norm back then. So
today I look around and see .... lots of cables! Hey guys ... ever hear
of bolt cutters?

Since I don't race or ride more than 20 miles/day, I don't care that my
lock is heavy. What does bug be though is the chattering noise it makes
now. My Kryptonite hanger was always clamped to the "horizontal tube"
(I don't know what it's called) and just forward of the tip of the
saddle; several days ago the sheet metal tore a good pair of shorts, so
I moved it to the seat tube. Now the lock's flat closure bar rattles
and buzzes ... and I keep checking to see if the rear del needs a nudge
to one side or the other. I need to get a small binji and fix that
lock!

I do not rely on this lock at my work place, where there is probably
a higher likelihood of professional thieves.

As on this ng, where you need Kryptonite's best.

:-)

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