Extreme Solutions to the Never-Ending Tour de France Cheating Scandal

* Lifetime ban

* Sequestered cyclists

On Jul 31, 6:43 am, "Breaking News" wrote:
* Lifetime ban

* Sequestered cyclists

Ban water.

It's performance-enhancing, potentially dangerous, and at least we'll
truly know that everyone is really doping.

MMan wrote:
Ban water.
It's performance-enhancing, potentially dangerous, and at least we'll
truly know that everyone is really doping.

And Viagra. And you might as well ban beer and add a rule forcing
cyclists to wear a condom while they ride just to be on the safe side
(perhaps they can be allowed to take it off on the last climb).

On Jul 31, 4:43 am, "Breaking News" wrote:
* Lifetime ban

* Sequestered cyclists

Ban testing.

On Jul 31, 9:58 am, Marty wrote:
On Jul 31, 4:43 am, "Breaking News" wrote:

* Lifetime ban

* Sequestered cyclists

Ban testing.

Ban riders who cannot prove they are using performance enhancing drugs.

Al wrote:

On Jul 31, 9:58 am, Marty wrote:
On Jul 31, 4:43 am, "Breaking News" wrote:

* Lifetime ban

* Sequestered cyclists

Ban testing.

Ban riders who cannot prove they are using performance enhancing drugs.


I'm pretty sure clean riders can't swim very well, so we throw all the pros
into the deep end of a swimming pool with a 10-lb lead weight chained to
their waist. If they make it out alive, we know they are doping so they
are banned for life.

Variations of this method have been shown to be extremely effective in
other situations.

--
Bill Asher

On Jul 31, 6:43 am, "Breaking News" wrote:
* Lifetime ban

This would be fine once you get get 100% fool prof tests.

* Sequestered cyclists

This might be tough to do.
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Alex