Why Europeans secretly love America

On Feb 4, 12:18 am, "Edward Dolan" wrote:

This is what comes of being the world's policeman. If other nations would
pull their share, we could sit back and enjoy the good life like the
Europeans do.

Have you gone quite mad, Edward? We Europeans enjoy the good life that
General George Marshall, blessed be the memory of his Plan, promised
us *precisely* because the US taxpayers funds the major defense
expenditure of NATO, for which we would otherwise have to reach even
deeper into our own pockets. Our politicians can *afford* to disdain
the US, and spray moralistic little homilies over its President like
spittle from a ticket tout's mouth, precisely because we live in the
umbrella of its security. Why, idiots who'd be shot in the back by
their own comrades if we had to maintain decent armies can earn a good
living sneering from the stages of clubs and halls at the homely
virtues of President Reagan, who removed the nuclear Damocle's Sword
from over our heads by splashing out liberally of your money on the
poker game of SDI.

Of course, Americans do have certain advantages. They can still buy a
large 1970s car and fit a small block Chevy engine to it, while the
biggest selling car in Europe is the Fiat Punto, a stylish but gutless
little thing that runs 50 miles on a rubber band. And why, in the
States even a black man can carry arms on his bicycle, as we heard the
other day, while a European who merely wants to keep a shotgun for
shooting loud crows in his backyard must go beg some poncey magistrate
for a license, which will no doubt be refused.

I beg you, my dear friend, don't disturb a status quo with so many
advantages all round.

Now get off your fat arse and go do something useful so we can
criticize you for it, and demand that you do it better while at the
same time denying you the means to do it at all. Another little war
would be good.

Andre Jute
I'm not joking

Euros are klaustrophobic

This is for you, my Lord Valve, and for you, Patrick. -- AJ

On Feb 4, 12:18 am, "Edward Dolan" wrote:

This is what comes of being the world's policeman. If other nations would
pull their share, we could sit back and enjoy the good life like the
Europeans do.

Have you gone quite mad, Edward? We Europeans enjoy the good life that
General George Marshall, blessed be the memory of his Plan, promised
us *precisely* because the US taxpayers fund the major defense
expenditure of NATO, for which we would otherwise have to reach even
deeper into our own pockets. Our politicians can *afford* to disdain
the US, and spray moralistic little homilies over its President like
spittle from a ticket tout's mouth, precisely because we live in the
umbrella of its security. Why, idiots who'd be shot in the back by
their own comrades if we had to maintain decent armies can earn a good
living sneering from the stages of clubs and halls at the homely
virtues of President Reagan, who removed the nuclear Damocle's Sword
from over our heads by splashing out liberally of your money on the
poker game of SDI.

Of course, Americans do have certain advantages. They can still buy a
large 1970s car and fit a small block Chevy engine to it, while the
biggest selling car in Europe is the Fiat Punto, a stylish but gutless
little thing that runs 50 miles on a rubber band. And why, in the
States even a black man can carry arms on his bicycle, as we heard the
other day, while a European who merely wants to keep a shotgun for
shooting loud crows in his backyard must go beg some poncey magistrate
for a license, which will no doubt be refused.

I beg you, my dear friend, don't disturb a status quo with so many
advantages all round.

Now get off your fat arse and go do something useful so we can
criticize you for it, and demand that you do it better while at the
same time denying you the means to do it at all. Another little war
would be good.

Andre Jute
I'm not joking

take some pressure off? have your photo taken with 3-4 exotic dancers
in delicto.

datakoll aka Gene Daniels wrote:
Euros are klaustrophobic

Be very, very, very afraid of people named Klaus.

--
Tom Sherman - 42.435731,-83.985007

Now get off your fat arse and go do something useful so we can
criticize you for it, and demand that you do it better while at the
same time denying you the means to do it at all. Another little war
would be good.

Andre Jute
I'm not joking

Isn't one of the points of the EU specifically to avoid the sort of regional
conflicts that might lead to a "little war?"

And in my travels in France, I found plenty of appreciation among the locals
for Americans, specifically in stores and pubs. I was told, more than once,
that most French enjoy American tourists (most of the time), because the
Americans are the only tourists who don't understand that they're not
supposed to be bullied by the German tourists. Everybody else apparently
gives in (lets them cut in line or whatever it is they supposedly do) while
the Americans hold their ground (because we don't know any better).

Regional differences are quite interesting and stereotypes far more useful
than they should be. For example, watching the final stage of the Tour de
France (in Paris), I discovered that Spanish folk have no real sense of
personal space. Or at least not somebody else's personal space anyway. They
would just keep pushing in tighter and tighter and tighter, and if you dared
move from your spot for an instant, well, those around could *try* to hold
it for you, but they wouldn't succeed. Once you figure this out, you deal
with it appropriately, but do *not* expect to be able to explain to them
that you've tried to create your own little piece of defensible space. It
just won't work. You think they're being rude, but that's not it at all. It
just doesn't make sense to them.

As for Americans, I've found that it's never a good idea to be in a group of
more than 6. At 8, it's a certainty. You're going to have some idiot who has
maybe had too much to drink (but usually not required) making an arse of
himself (usually a guy) about why the French don't appreciate the fact that
we bailed them out in WWII. Or why things are done differently in France
than in the US (typically a complaint about restaraunt service). Geez, if
you wanted everything to be the same, why travel?

--Mike Jacoubowsky
Chain Reaction Bicycles
www.ChainReaction.com
Redwood City & Los Altos, CA USA

In article ,
Tom Sherman °_° wrote:

datakoll aka Gene Daniels wrote:
Euros are klaustrophobic

Be very, very, very afraid of people named Klaus.

Including Santa Klaus?

--
"I wear the cheese, it does not wear me."

datakoll aka Gene Daniels wrote:
Euros are klaustrophobic

Tom Sherman °_° wrote:
Be very, very, very afraid of people named Klaus.

Tim McNamara wrote:
Including Santa Klaus?


Not so much fun as The Wrath of God:
http://heisseluft.files.wordpress.co...aus_kinski.jpg

--
Andrew Muzi
www.yellowjersey.org/
Open every day since 1 April, 1971

"Mike Jacoubowsky" wrote in message
m...
[...]
Regional differences are quite interesting and stereotypes far more useful
than they should be. For example, watching the final stage of the Tour de
France (in Paris), I discovered that Spanish folk have no real sense of
personal space. Or at least not somebody else's personal space anyway.
They would just keep pushing in tighter and tighter and tighter, and if
you dared move from your spot for an instant, well, those around could
*try* to hold it for you, but they wouldn't succeed. Once you figure this
out, you deal with it appropriately, but do *not* expect to be able to
explain to them that you've tried to create your own little piece of
defensible space. It just won't work. You think they're being rude, but
that's not it at all. It just doesn't make sense to them.

Americans simply do not know how to queue. Whether at the bank or the post
office, folks stand several arm lengths from one another while waiting in
line. Much of the time it is hard to determine where the line is everyone is
so spaced out. We could take some lessons from the English about how to
queue.

Regards,

Ed Dolan the Great - Minnesota
aka
Saint Edward the Great - Order of the Perpetual Sorrows - Minnesota

In article ,
AMuzi wrote:

datakoll aka Gene Daniels wrote:
Euros are klaustrophobic

Tom Sherman °_° wrote:
Be very, very, very afraid of people named Klaus.

Tim McNamara wrote:
Including Santa Klaus?


Not so much fun as The Wrath of God:
http://heisseluft.files.wordpress.co...aus_kinski.jpg

Dude. Way to give me nominitoklausophobia. Yikes!

--
"I wear the cheese, it does not wear me."