How to make an ugly bike

I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. While I am in the store
I am always paranoid that someone will steal my bike.

So I got this old GT hardtail mountain bike for free and have spent
$50 fixing it up. It is almost finished and I want to make it
functional, but as ugly as possible so no one will want to steal it.

I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Tom

Thomas Reynolds wrote:

I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. While I am in the store
I am always paranoid that someone will steal my bike.

So I got this old GT hardtail mountain bike for free and have spent
$50 fixing it up. It is almost finished and I want to make it
functional, but as ugly as possible so no one will want to steal it.

I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Duck tape handlebar grips (even more horrendous on drop bars).
Unfortunately it makes them rather uncomfortable if you use less than 10
layers. Rusty steel mudguards (may be called fenders where you live) and
chain guard. More Duck tape (grey instead of black this time) to protect
the paintwork where you know it will get bashed. Plastic bag over the
saddle. More Duck tape to make sure the plastic bag doesn't come off.
Barbie bell. Cover the pink bits of the Barbie bell with (you guessed
it) Duck tape. Paint the rusty bits with red oxide primer. Cover with
final top coat of Duck tape.

That ought to do it.

I have no connection with either manufacturers or resellers of Duck
tape. Neither has my bike been stolen in London (UK).

--
Jim Price

http://www.jimprice.dsl.pipex.com

Conscientious objection is hard work in an economic war.

Just go to Walmart and buy a new one. or use theirs for examples, especially
the paint jobs hoping to make the bike look expensive, :)

"Thomas Reynolds" wrote in message
m...
I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. While I am in the store
I am always paranoid that someone will steal my bike.

So I got this old GT hardtail mountain bike for free and have spent
$50 fixing it up. It is almost finished and I want to make it
functional, but as ugly as possible so no one will want to steal it.

I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Tom

28 Jul 2003 15:53:52 -0700,
,
(Thomas Reynolds) wrote:

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Tom

Put a ratty saddle on it.

A fixed gear and the tiniest clipless pedals supposedly deters, or
failing that, at least hampers, opportunistic thievery.
--
zk

"Thomas Reynolds" wrote in message
m...
I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. ...
I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Put a milk crate on the back.
Very handy for carrying stuff back from the store, and makes almost any bike
look worthless.

One fellow club member put on slime green paint (the stuff that wears off --
used for marking the annual fundraiser ride).

A messenger's bike I saw won the ugly contest as far as I'm concerned. He
had some soft spongy material for handgrips and they looked positively
diseased ... which might be particularly effective in Toronto over the past
few SARS stricken months. Thank gosh that seems to be over.

But you can't rely on ugly. Some thieves steal bikes forconvenient
transportation. Doesn't matter if it's any good, it's always easier than
walking. And as they're only stealing for this ride, it doesn't matter how
distinctive you make it.

But you might be able to leave your tire-painted, carpet-glued wonder longer
than most. Just make sure it's locked next to less ugly, easier to steal
bikes and you should be able to leave that bike to your grandchildren.

You don't always have to ride crap. I often ride a $2k CDN/$1.5k US bike to
work but the bike rack is only visible to people with authorized business in
my building and the area is surveyed by security cameras and guards.

If I have to park downtown I bring a Trek 800, a cheap crappy heavyweight,
but upgraded so it actually works smooth as silk... if you have the muscle
power to hump it up hills. It's "uglied" with lots of reflective tape,
fenders, front and rear racks, smooth tires and even mud flaps. No
self-respecting thief would be caught dead on it but if they try, the NY
Ulock will slow them down.

By mistake I brought my good commuter to a mid town bar for a work function.
I brought it in, within 10 feet of me and locked it. Any complaints and I
would have left. No one complained so we enjoyed the evening and the bar
enjoyed our money.

Doug
Toronto

"Thomas Reynolds" wrote in message
m...
I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. While I am in the store
I am always paranoid that someone will steal my bike.

So I got this old GT hardtail mountain bike for free and have spent
$50 fixing it up. It is almost finished and I want to make it
functional, but as ugly as possible so no one will want to steal it.

I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Tom

Hang a Fred-looking phoney California license plate on the back of it
that says "Fabrizio".

You're all missing the point:
Why not use a good lock- one that can't be defeated - like Kryptonite's
New York lock?
Then you don't have to screw up the appearance of your bike.
And it's much easier to do.

Thomas Reynolds wrote:

I am interested in making a bike ugly because I often ride a bike to
the store or the 7-11 and lock it up outside. While I am in the store
I am always paranoid that someone will steal my bike.

So I got this old GT hardtail mountain bike for free and have spent
$50 fixing it up. It is almost finished and I want to make it
functional, but as ugly as possible so no one will want to steal it.

I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Tom

On 28 Jul 2003 15:53:52 -0700, Thomas Reynolds
wrote:
I have painted the frame several different colors and plan on gluing a
piece of shag carpetting to the top tube. I've considered painting
the rims and tires also.

Those treatments may make it ugly, but it would be so
garish and unique, many would be attracted to it,
especially the types that would steal it.

Any more ideas on how to make the bike ugly?

Rust, and lots of it. Broken cable housings. Torn saddle.
Tires with nylon showing through. Missing spokes. Bent
spokes. Masking tape and duct tape, especially for grips.
Bent/broken pedals.

And don't forget the rust.

Tom
--
Rick Onanian

On Mon, 28 Jul 2003 17:18:51 -0700, Zoot Katz
wrote:
A fixed gear and the tiniest clipless pedals supposedly deters, or
failing that, at least hampers, opportunistic thievery.

m2racer Orbs would definately deter a theif -- somebody would have
to bring pedals, or carry the bike away. I can't imagine riding them
in sneakers..
http://www.m2racer.com/products.php?cat=2

--
Rick Onanian